stuck

I was pretty sure that I've already gone through my mid-life crisis (unless you can have more than one--and if so, that stinks)...but, now I'm not so sure.  I feel stuck.  I'm not delusional to think that I can go to any other company and not "start off at the bottom"; but the paycheck that I make now cannot really change.  We cannot really afford to have less than we do now.  And where's that magical job?  That pays the same as I make now (or more), with those wonderful days and super hours...???  Uh, huh.

I know that I really can go do anything--anywhere else--and be successful at it...but retail is what I have now spent more than a decade doing.  And, I fear, that retail will be where I'm "stuck" the rest of my life.  I'm good at my job, but doing something different really appeals to me.  I don't know what I would go do, in particular, but I like the thought of "re-inventing" myself.  I also know that starting over with a company or type of work comes at a cost...

All of life is a trade-off.  You are constantly trading one thing for another.  It all comes down to what holds the higher value to you..."happiness" at your job or the amount of your paycheck.  I trade "good days/liking my job" for the amount of my paycheck.  I know that there's no guarantee that I'll go to another job (in retail or not) and trade a lower paycheck for more "good days or happy at my job"...

Thus my conundrum.  AND, then, on top of that I feel much like a whiny child.  I've got this job.  Now.  I make this much money.  Every week.  But I don't "like" it...I want to do something different?  (ungrateful much?)

Fortunately for me, this day and age enables me to be whiny in print for everyone to see...lol.  =)